Monthly Archives: May 2016

I want to feel complete

27 Friday May 2016

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I’m laying in my bed,

I close my eyes and imagine a time,

Where I might wake up in someone else’s bed.

Look deeply into their eyes.

And know that I am there because I am loved.

Loved deeply and with the whole of their soul.

I want to wake up from this agonizing nightmare.

And be in the arms of the one who cares most.

I want tomorrow to be different.

I want forever to be different.
I want to look into his eyes,

And feel like there is no where in the world I am needed more,

Then here.

I want to be wrapped in his arms

And feel all the broken pieces of my soul,

Be slowly pushed back together.
I want so much more than is provided to me.

I want what seems so far out of reach.

I want nothing more than to feel loved.

I want nothing more than to feel at ease.

I want my world to be calm and peaceful.

I want you.

That sunrise

24 Tuesday May 2016

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The windows were down, 
Letting the cool night air,

Breeze through the car. 

Blasting our favorite songs, 

That reminded us of better days. 

Driving aimlessly through the night,

Letting the moon guide our way. 

The later it got,

And the more the moon settled into the skyline, 

The sky above us started to change. 

We drove towards the colors, 

Being redirected by the beauty. 
While we walked the short distance, 

From the car to the ocean. 

The sun,

Slowly as if not to frighten us,

Started to rise from its slumber. 

The water glistened from its rays. 

The sky turned magenta, powder blue, & baby pink. 

All at once. 

A shock of color filled the landscape in front of me. 

My breathe hitched and a single tear rolled down my cheek. 

This was the first time a sunrise had taken my breathe away. 
My boys joking beside me, 

Brought me back to reality. 

Sitting on those rocks, 

To passer Byers, 

We must of looked like a bunch of hooligans. 

But if they knew us. 

At that moment. 

We were as pure as that sunrise. 

He’s not gone yet..

03 Tuesday May 2016

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I haven’t spent hours talking about him yet because he’s not gone. 
It’s just I haven’t seen his eyes in the sunlight. 

And I haven’t seen his smile brighten up a room. 

And I haven’t felt his arms around me. 

And I haven’t heard his laugh in person, 

So I can’t compare it to a thousand angels singing. 

And he hasn’t made me laugh, 

When i have tears streaming down my face,

While listening to the rain hit my windows. 
I can’t go on and on about this boy because he’s not gone yet. 

And I’m praying that he’ll never be gone. 

Because I wanna experience the world with him. 

Because he is the single person I get most excited to talk too. 

And I don’t think I will be able to bear it. 

Because no one has lit the candle in my heart in the longest time. 

And it’s bringing back all the warmth I’ve lost.